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Alex: Emotional hangover

July 15, 2011

Yesterday was rough. It was the first day I had all to myself, and I didn’t take well to it. I wasn’t tired, but all I wanted to do was sleep, eat, and shower because those things passed the most time. It was fairly miserable. I suspect the problem is a multifaceted one.

First, and most prominently, this was the first day I had that was truly lacking adventure. No travel, no caves, no exotic landscapes, not even any boring bus rides or campus tours. Just sitting in my room. After a week of non-stop excitement, I felt the lack of it with acute depression. It was like all the air had suddenly been sucked out of me, and there was no hope of getting it back. Everything I tried to do to amuse myself just bored me to sleep. Even exercise, which I tried multiple times, hoping it would at least get my blood pumping, was mind-numbing.

I suspect also that spending so much time listening to this audiobook of mine, which is fantastic by the way, has put in somewhat of a lethargic mood. Reading often has this effect on me, but with this book there is the added effect that it is so enthralling that I do not wish to do anything, for fear of missing some exciting action in the book.

Finally, I suspect a large part of my problem was a combination of culture shock and generally feeling out of place. Most of my familiar distractions do not work here (netflix, Hulu, even WoW locked me out for trying to access it from a strange location), there is NOTHING on television here, and everyone else I know seems to be having a ton of fun. I’ve felt a little left out for a while on this trip, since I didn’t come here for adventure (I came for exhilarating research), and even if I had I don’t really have the resources to partake in all the adventure and much of the excitement of the rest of the group. (It’s hard to go out drinking every night for seven dollars a beer).

I suspect I’m also nervous about classes, although it feels more like excitement to me, I am apprehensive about finding my way around yet another strange campus, especially when class listings use some sort of strange number code, rather than building names to give location.

So in order to cheer myself up a emailed a few moko artists in the area, none of whom have yet replied, and watched some Masterchef Australia before the even-more-mind-numbing news came on.

I ate too much and went to bed early and sad.

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